Articles & Advice

Print Article The key to happiness in marriage can pretty much be summed up like this: A husband says to his wife, "Yes, dear." (A lot.)

Reuters reports that men may hold the power and wealth of the workplace, but women rule the home. That's the word from a team of researchers at Iowa State University, who have determined that women take the lead on solving the problems of the marriage and household -- and men are basically happy to let them do that.

The study: The participants were 72 couples who had been married an average of seven years. All were relatively happy in their marriages. Each spouse independently completed a questionnaire about relationship satisfaction and did an assessment of overall decision-making within the relationship. Separately, each person was asked to identify a problem in the relationship. Couples were reunited and discussed those problem topics for 10 minutes. After the researchers left the room, these conversations were videotaped.

The results: The researchers rated each couple's interaction for demand and withdraw behaviors, including avoidance, discussion, blame, pressure for change and withdrawal. Overall, the wives not only talked more, but also got their husbands to agree with them.

"The women were communicating more powerful messages, and men were responding to those messages by agreeing or giving in," study co-leader David Vogel said in a statement. "The study at least suggests that the marriage is a place where women can exert some power. Whether or not it's because of changing societal roles, we don't know. But they are, at least, taking responsibility and power in these relationships."

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