Articles & Advice

What is it about older women that men find irresistible? Below, men share their sometimes surprising thoughts on why women over the age of 50 make them swoon far more than their younger counterparts.

The confidence game
"Women over 50 have a sense of self-confidence that younger ones do not. A certain sense of self-assuredness comes with age -- especially for women, I think. To me, there's nothing more attractive than a woman who doesn't let herself get overly consumed with trying to be someone she's not or feeling like she has to fit into some sort of mold for a man -- or the world in general -- to accept her. Self-confidence is just incredibly sexy, and older women are much more likely to display it than younger women are."
-- Carl, 56, New York, NY

What's wrong with being high-maintenance?
"I know a lot of people think it's bad that women often become preoccupied with their looks as they age -- trying things like Botox and plastic surgery and all. However, I actually think it's not such a bad thing after all. I think a lot of younger girls run around looking like they just rolled out of bed, with dark circles under their eyes and their hair up and all messy. I'm not sure why they don't seem to care, but it's just unattractive to me. I love how older women really take care of themselves and genuinely want to look good. I love it when a woman has her hair and makeup done and puts on a pretty dress. To me, that's sexy."
-- Barry, 59, Rochester, NY

It's not all about kids
"I love that women at this age are focused on themselves and their relationships. They aren't obsessed with meeting someone who will be willing to start a family with them in the way that women who are in their 20s or 30s are. I'm not interested in having kids at all, and honestly I am tired of meeting women whose primary goal is to meet a man who wants to procreate. It's like, aren't you interested in me as a person? There's something truly sexy about 'sex' being the focus of sex!"
-- Jim, 42, Odessa, TX

Reading is fundamental
"I'm an avid reader, and nothing turns me on more than a woman who enjoys discussing books and even attending book readings as much as I do. Maybe it's just the pool of women I meet, but I find that older women are more likely to be well-read than a woman, say, in her 20s, and less apt to find magazines -- especially celebrity-focused ones -- engrossing the way it seems younger women do."
-- Jay, 52, San Francisco, CA

The bedtime story
"Most likely, a woman over 50 knows her way around a bedroom -- and a man's body. I find that an older woman's arsenal of tricks almost always far surpasses that of a woman half her age. I'd much rather share an evening under the covers with an older woman over one with a younger woman any day!"
-- Sean, 36, Ft. Lauderdale, FL

Don't show me the money
"Women who are older and have been in the workforce longer are usually a lot more financially secure than ones who are younger and just starting out their careers. Because of this, they usually aren't so interested in what I bring to the table financially the way that women who are younger are. As a result, their focus is more on who I am as a person. You wouldn't believe how many younger women I meet are just interested in me because I drive a nice car. There's nothing less attractive than a gold-digger, and in my experience, there just aren't as many who are over the age of 50."
-- Richard, 57, Reston, VA

Culture vultures
"The women I've dated who are 50+ have been so worldly. They've introduced me to all kinds of wonderful things -- how to pick a great wine, what there is to enjoy about opera, and things like that. I feel as if I have richer experiences with these women versus younger women ... my senses have come alive. Now, that's sexy!"
-- Mark, 41, Quincy, MA


Chelsea Kaplan is deputy editor of www.thefamilygroove.com and regularly appears as a guest on XM Radio's "Broad Minded." Her blog, "I'm Somebody's Mother?" can be found at www.rumymother.blogspot.com.