Articles & Advice

It's a New Year and time for a new outlook on dating. A good relationship can be one of life's greatest pleasures. This year, vow not to fall back on your old ways and be prepared to give your best effort to meet your match. We have compiled a 2009 checklist for dating success because with the right tools and attitude you will find the relationship of your dreams.

Write down what is most important to you in a mate.
Most people have never taken the time to write down everything they would want in a potential mate. Finding common ground is important to spark interesting conversation but when it comes to your values and personal beliefs you'll want to find a partner that is on the same page as you. Writing down these characteristics helps you uncover what you're willing to live with and what you can't live without. Nobody is perfect, but you should never have to settle. However, it is important to date with realistic expectations of a partner. Setting the bar so high that even a superhuman couldn't reach it only stops you from meeting someone you might actually like.

Be confident and happy.
People fall in love with someone they want to be around. Would you want to date a bitter and unsure person? Think of your greatest attribute, or ask a friend to name it, and whether it be, your intellect, kindness, humor or smile, focus on that attribute to gain more confidence. Feeling down? Walk into a room with a smile on. Scientists have found that smiling actually makes you feel happier.

Never miss an opportunity to meet someone new.
The key to successful dating is to never let an opportunity pass you by. Broaden your social network, take up a new hobby or activity and let your friends and family know you're ready to date and looking for the right person. Online dating is a great way to quickly improve your chances of dating success because the profiles reveal so much about the person that you can narrow in on who you might think is a potential good match. You can also get to know the person over the phone or online without having to first meet face to face.

Stop comparing yourself to other people.
With dating comes rejection. Not every person is going to be a successful fit with you. He or she may not have felt the connection or spark that you might have but that doesn't mean that there is something wrong with you, it just means you haven't found the right match.

Ask yourself what you did right and do more of that next time.
It's important to be optimistic that you will find the right person. If you're convinced there isn't anyone out there for you then potential suitors will start to believe it too. Have a positive mental attitude and be determined to have a good experience. If the person isn't the right match for you at least you'll be expanding your social network or gaining dating momentum.

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Most people want a happy and self-confident person as a partner. If your date wasn't a success, ask yourself what anecdote you told that got a great laugh, or what story you recounted that the person seemed to be really engaged in and simply do more of that on your next date with someone new.

Am I ready to date?
You have to be willing and ready to meet your perfect mate. If you are still in love with your ex you may not be ready to give 100 percent of yourself to someone else. However, you can't wait forever. You may need to see a therapist or talk with friends and family to find out what's really holding you back before you can successfully get back in the dating world.

Next: How to Become Your Sexiest Self in 2009