6 Compliments to Make Her Melt

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6 Compliments to Make Her Melt

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Filed under: Communication, Relationships, Men Only, Match

Posted Jun 23rd 2009 12:00AM

by Ted Kluck, for Match.com

In grade school, we learned that if you tell Susie you like her shoes, she will probably respond favorably, and better yet, if you allow Susie the time and attention to talk about herself and her life, she will like you even more. People crave compliments, attention, and applause.

Back then the payoff was that Susie would let you eat some of her paste or give you a haircut with those wicked snub-nosed scissors they handed out each fall. Whereas now, the payoff is a deepening relationship, a good time or another date. But the principles remain the same.

Listen
Perhaps the greatest compliment we can give another is to show genuine interest in their life. And one of the greatest ways to communicate love is to listen intently. If we ask the simple questions, she will respond with respect. Ask her about her new job, her love of yoga, her collection of KISS albums -- whatever. Getting to know someone is the best possible compliment.

Support
Sense when she feels that the world is against her and begin working to build her up. Tell her you appreciate her efforts at work and at home or her commitment to keeping herself looking good.

Admire
Tell her what you enjoy and admire (her sense of humor, her taste in films, her personality) about her.

Pay attention
Work very, very hard to dispel the stereotype that men are inattentive and don't notice anything. Pay attention, notice and compliment the new pair of shoes, haircut or outfit. These things matter not because they are outward purchases, but because they are expressions of her creativity and personality.

Learn
Let her teach you something. Tell her that there are elements of her personality and character that you would like to implement in your own life. Ask her to teach you how to cook a favorite dish or read her favorite novel together. Let her know that knowing her makes you a more complete person.

Grow
Finally, give her the ultimate compliment by working to be the kind of person she would want to be with. Staying in shape, engaging her on emotional and intellectual levels and showing her kindness by helping out are all tangible ways to let her know that she matters to you.

Next: 9 Ways to Meet a Man

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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 2)

christina

Jul 25th 2009 @ 12:32AM report

wow,this article alone made my heart melt!

Linda

Jul 25th 2009 @ 1:57AM report

Me too ...too bad most men aren't this way.

clamport

Jul 25th 2009 @ 7:25AM report

Okay girls, the best we can do is print the article, memorize it, live it, offer it to the man of our dreams whom believes in reciprocation; it's a win-win, but of course it's the ideal. Also, print it and ingrain and model it for our sons AND daughters. This article is a great launching pad to re-instill common sense, respectful, esteem-building, and relationship sustaining standards of mutual respect, unwavering commitment, trust and focus that has rapidly been waning and is now nearly extinct in today's disposal marriages and families. These sensible, reasonable, healthy, relationship-proofing standards to strengthen monogamous couples and famiies listed in the article, need to reinstated as expectations and revered once again by society as the typical and common majority as opposed to one of many socially accepted options in which the degradation of family units in society are accepted as mere casualties that cannot be controlled or influenced (that the divorce rate and single/foster parenthood, etc.is inevitable). This is blatantly false. Efforts to maintain HEALTHY family units are not only financially beneficial to our economy and national communities,but those great benfits are miniscule to the untold benefits, greatness, and unknown hope that children and parents can experience through a daily life of family unity, strength, familial and personal identity, teamwork, and the security in the knowledge of stability and foreverness together no matter what life may bring them. Without strong cohesive families, we really have a weaker society and citiizens, because familes endure forever. Our examples need to lie with all of the generations before us, when familes and their extended members actions indicated nary a thought to abandon or fracture their family; it was apparently never a thought. Let's learn from them, re-establish standards, commit with a fiery determination when you are certain and make the commitment to family, and as our forefathrs before us, never even think of giving up; it's not an option.

Judith

Jul 27th 2009 @ 1:40AM report

Clamport - oh please talk to me - it has been a few days since I read your comments, but no other person has made the sense that you have in your rather lengthy discourse. I loved it!

Judith

Jul 27th 2009 @ 1:41AM report

Clamport - I want to talk to you

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