Dear Sugar & Spice ... There's a man I'm really interested in, but I'm not sure if he's gay. I have nothing against him being gay, but I'd like to know upfront if I am wasting my time pursuing him. Should I ask? He has many ''dear'' female friends, goes out almost every night and never asks any ''offensive'' womanizing questions. He doesn't even say anything fresh to me.
What should I do?
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A Little Sugar
He's gorgeous, hot and just so dreamy, so he's perfect for Spice, well maybe. Before we send Spice out after him, you probably should investigate further to be certain he's batting on the right team. So on top of the other clues you've noted Nancy Drew, find out what type of television he watches. If he rattles off Fine Living or Food Network, then proceed to question No. 2 since you're starting to get warm -- very warm. Where does he like to vacation? Popular gay vacation destinations like South Beach or even Cape Cod's PTown? Did that work or are you still confused? If so, then try to figure out if he's straight. Ask him if he knows what NCAA stands for. If he does, this man is all yours because no self-respecting gay male is going to get that excited for hoops. Ask him more straight questions to validate, but don't ask if he has a girlfriend since, gay or straight, your cover will be blown and he'll know you're lusting after him. Chime In | Meet Sugar
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A Lot of Spice
Um, your spider senses are really off if you think that he's gay just because he goes out a lot, has female friends and isn't asking you offensive questions or being fresh. Not only do you need to re-calibrate your gaydar, you need to do a serious check on the heterosexual men you're used to spending time with. As far as I know, there's only one way to tell if a man is gay -- he has sex with men. Unless you know an old boyfriend of his, don't make any assumptions based on stereotypes, especially not the things you're focused on. Don't ask him. Just take some time to get to know him better before actively ''pursuing'' him, and you'll get the answer to your question soon enough.
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