Online -- Keeping Their Options Open?
Dear Sugar & Spice ... I have been on a dating web site for about a year or so. Recently, I've connected online with a guy who I have an interest in. He has one child, a great job, is down to earth and very confident. We've met four times over the past three weeks and we seem to be hitting it off. Meanwhile, I've noticed that he's still checking his online personal -- roughly once a day. I am doing the same thing -- checking e-mails -- but I haven't really responded to any other men since he currently has my eye. Since it's been a short period of time, when is the right time to talk about removing/hiding our online personals? I don't want to rush him, but I don't want to wait around to find he's found someone else. He say's he's not a career dater so is there a right way and time to bring up the subject?
Search for Local Singles
A Little Sugar
You're stressed about his actions yet you appear to be doing the exact same thing. What type of e-mail are you expecting other than a potential love connection from your personals account? Stop trying to rationalize your behavior since you know very well you're keeping your options open. Four dates is still not enough time to declare him a land grab. When is the right time to cancel out your personal? No hard fast rule except when you both feel that you've graduated to the next level -- one that you are both head over heels for each other. I recommend you spend more time with him to firm up what you have. This lessens the need to check one's personal e-mail and, as you both get closer, the reliance on that account will disappear so there isn't a need to bring up that touchy subject. On the flip side, a current personals account six months in is a great barometer that things might not be as good as you like.
Take a Look! She Might Just Be Here
A Lot of Spice
It is so easy to get excited about someone you're really interested in, but sometimes we let the honeymoon haze blind us completely. Four dates is hardly enough time for you to know whether this is someone you want to be exclusive with. Not only should you not ask him about removing/hiding his profile, you shouldn't be thinking about hiding yours. I notice this with a lot of the women who are tired of the dating scene; they're ready to settle down with the first person who doesn't piss them off in the first few dates. Don't be so quick to commit before there's any real reason to. Give yourself more time to get to know him before you start forsaking all others and asking him to do the same.