Love Advice ... Telling You Like It Is
Sugar & Spice: She Wants a Baby, But On Her Own -- Does It Take Two to Tango?





Dear Sugar & Spice ... I'm a 38 year-old single gal with a great job, great personality and over the top looks. I date pretty regularly, but haven't found anyone worth writing home about. The problem is that I want to know how to get pregnant without a husband. I don't have 'the one' right now, with no prospects of finding 'the one' before my clock runs out. I'm ready to be single and face the challenges on my own. I just want to know how to get pregnant without a commitment or scaring the guy off?

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      Sugar's Profile on Love & Dating

      A Little Sugar

      Who says you need a man to do what you want to do? Since love doesn't necessarily follow your biological clock, go to a sperm bank and take out a loan. Just make sure the 'loan' is of choice stock since you don't want some toothless tortoise as your offspring. My issue would be if you plan to trip a man up to get pregnant then run with baby in tow. That's like knowing you're HIV-positive and having unsafe sex willingly. Both have a direct impact on the other person with a potential for a lawsuit. So stay away from turning love into a transaction and go the route that most others go, even adoption is an option. I, for one, don't believe it takes a village to raise a child nor that you have to have a mom and a dad. What it does take is an individual (or individuals) who can give constant love, support and guidance.

          Spice's Profile on Love & Dating

          A Lot of Spice

          Hmmmm. I'm not sure how I feel about this. On the one hand, I completely understand the pressure of that damn clock, and sometimes your love life is on a completely different timetable. But I'm not sure that having a child without his father is a good idea either. Granted I wouldn't trade my daughter for the world, but the challenges you will face far exceed the basic needs and necessities you might be focused on, like the financial stability your good job brings. Are you ready to answer your child's questions when they're aching for their father's love and attention? What if the father decides he wants to be a part of the child's life after all? What about health history and the importance of family connections? If none of that makes you think twice, maybe a sperm donor is the best way to go. At least that way, you've got some answers when your child asks ''Where is my daddy?''